Relationships Stage 4: Second Honeymoon
7 Stages of a Healthy Relationship
The Second Honeymoon
The Commitment and Friendship Stage or Second Honeymoon is the point
in a relationship when couples reach a new level of intimacy with depth
Now there is the quiet after the storm. The relationship has settled. A deepening sense of friendship, commitment, trust and stability grows letting you get back to getting on with your life. You know where you stand with each other, you each have your own space and have more confidence and trust in your relationship. This is a calm and relaxing time, compared to the Conflict Stage.
There can be some hankering for the person they thought they knew a
couple of stages earlier, but it is a maturation process to let the
infatuation induced fantasy go, with a smile, as a fond memory and
embrace the real person, your best friend you are now committed to and
start really planning ahead.
At this point in the relationship couples reach a new level of
intimacy with a depth and stability. The intense, but superficial,
infatuation has developed into deeper feelings of love and trust between
the partners. There is a predictability in the relationship which
builds confidence and security. You find you can accept that your
partner is not perfect, and you can accept your partner for who s/he is
and find yourself comfortable with this.
Now you have some experience in resolving your conflicts, so when any
do arise, as they are wont to do from time to time, you are able deal
with them without feeling threatened.
A relationship really begins when there is commitment, as there is
now. Enjoying the warmth of love, your bond strengthens with your
deepening relationship. Your lifelong relationship really starts here,
the previous three stages were preparing you for the real thing.
A warning though. Feeling comfortable with each
other, do not get complacent and take each other for granted. This is
the biggest danger to your relationship at this stage. A survey in the
USA found that the time before a partner starts to take the other for
granted, lasts on average two years, six months and 25 days. That falls
into this stage’s timeframe.
There is no risk for that as long as you do not take each
other for granted and communicate, communicate and . . . did I say
But there are more hurdles on the way, and it is more than a bay to the Child Stage